Never be a bridesmaid in New York

 　　Vanessa is a good friend of mine and asked me to be a bridesmaid at her wedding, and I was so excited when I got her invitation. I thought that what was waiting for me must be the intimate private rooms of the girls, let's go to customize a beautiful wedding dress, and then participate in a few passionate little dances. How beautiful is that! But the result was totally unexpected. Brides-to-be in New York City all want their wedding to be offbeat and unique. They watched live broadcasts of celebrity weddings on TV, read the New York Times reports of high-class weddings, and then carefully planned and managed their own life-long events. Anyway, in a word, one's own wedding must not be careless and perfunctory.

　　Currently, Vanessa has spent nearly $60,000 for the wedding. Needless to say, her total wedding expenses will certainly far exceed this figure. I've also heard about "100% brides", which is how they pay attention to pomp and detail in order to make the wedding perfect. Now finally seeing is believing. In the few months before the marriage, Vanessa had changed a lot. She was not the smart, gentle, considerate, pure and lovely girl she used to be. Now she is indulging in trivial matters, to the point of being critical. All day long thinking about what flowers to put on the wedding table, how to walk on the grass in high heels, etc. She seems to only live for the wedding, she has nothing else to do, there is only one thing in her mind, besides the wedding, it is the wedding! She even confessed to me: I don't know what else to talk about with my fiancé Brian after the wedding, because these days, the only topic between them is the wedding!

　　And I have to spend at least a full $800 to complete my mission as a bridesmaid. I started off with an expensive wedding dress for $200 that I definitely won't wear after her wedding. Then bought a nearly $200 gift, ready to attend the bride's little dance, which is the bride's "farewell to the single" dance. Because the bride's female friends are getting together about a week before the wedding, everyone has to give her something. Plus, there's a teenage dance party before the wedding for $200. According to American wedding customs, a formal wedding also requires a gift, which is also $200.

　　The wedding is scheduled to take place at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden. This is a very beautiful place for a wedding of this type of luxurious ceremony. In such a fashionable venue, the price is naturally high. The wedding reception is set at a Chinese restaurant, and more than 300 guests will come to enjoy a 13- to 15-course meal per table.

　　In fact, I have no idea how much it will cost to hold a wedding. I just feel a little outrageous. It doesn't feel normal to organize a wedding with such fanfare. Vanessa, on the other hand, told me that weddings in New York City are expensive, and her expenses are only moderate. In her words, spending $5,000 for a wedding dress and $25,000 for a wedding reception is normal. Later, I also figured out that it was normal to be a bridesmaid once and to do what the bride-to-be asked for unconditionally. If even a little bit upsets those precious brides, then you have violated the laws of heaven and the gods.

　　For me, it's perfectly possible to meet all Vanessa's demands, reasonable or unreasonable, and be happy to put myself in her shoes and not let her down. However, I can't afford to be a bridesmaid for $800. I'm only 24 years old and still in college, and to me that $800 is an astronomical sum. If I were a little older, or had a decent job, that would be another matter. After this experience, I have made up my mind that I will never be a bridesmaid again. Bridesmaids can't afford it! I've told all my friends: I love them a lot, but I'm never going to be a bridesmaid until my time runs out. However, my sister's wedding was an exception. After all, blood is thicker than water. Besides, I will politely decline anyone who asks me to be a bridesmaid.