At eleven o'clock in the evening, my cell phone rang, and I was sleepy, and my heart was full of anxiety. On the other end of the phone, the weak and feeble voice is intermittent, accompanied by the rustling noise, which needs to be listened carefully and analyzed.
In the weak voice, I heard the second aunt, who was seriously ill, expressing with great effort: "Second aunt is dead, she is going to'go'... just dizzy, she has no strength... The second aunt is not sad, really. Sorry..."
This sentence, which sounds "relaxed" and "not sad", made me feel a sense of powerlessness, which made me feel extremely sad. Suddenly I felt depressed, suffocated, suffocated, suffocated, and burst into tears...
At this moment, I want to calm down, I want to be calm, I want to be relaxed, and give the weak second aunt some strength and comfort.
Knowing so much truth, having so much preparation, receiving so many calls, accumulating so many vocabulary... At
this moment, the words are poor, almost blank, only choked and said with tears. "Second aunt, take care!"
This is not just a short chat in a parent, it is a farewell to life, it is a yearning for family, it is a call for hope, it is a flow of empathy for blood.
Pressing the hang-up button may be the last sound, it may be the end of eternity, and may never see each other again in this life...
This painful torture is not on me, but why I am so painful and heartbroken.
Blood relationship is an extremely magical existence and connection. The most difficult thing in this world is to let oneself face or face the farewell of relatives, and in the process of gradually depleting his life, feeling overwhelmed.
"Is there any other treatments that the hospital can try?" I asked as calmly as I could.
"No, there is no effective way." I heard a weak reply.
"I have other people I know in Harbin. Is there any way I can help?" I asked unwillingly.
"No, I can't help." Replied disappointedly.
"Then do you have any wishes or expectations, do you need me to do it?" I calmed down and tried to get out of my sad emotions.
"No. Don't come, I'll simply'leave.' I want to tell you..." At
that moment, as the only girl in the family's generation and the only niece in my aunt's life, I could no longer be strong. , Just cried out like that.
From the low cry of endurance to the pouring and release, the second aunt, who is not able to use her hands and can’t speak clearly, became anxious when she heard my crying. She still said to me like she used to coax a child: "Don’t cry. Don't cry!" At
that moment, my heart was filled with grievances, and my mind was filled with the scene of this dying and extremely fragile elder struggling on the lifeline.
I remembered all the cares and protections she had for me, and the warmth and touch that she once had too much. Even if I am not in good health, I still worry about the little bit of my life and care about my children.
When I encountered difficulties and needed needs, my second aunt, who was already struggling, still insisted on accompany me through the difficulties.
After I refused decisively, she said a very simple but affectionate remark. She said: "When my niece has something, I must stand by."
Knowing a lot of poems and famous words, and the most simple language of the second aunt, But it became a ray of light that illuminates the affection and warmth in my life, soft and powerful.
I know a lot of truths and read a lot of books. When she was melancholy, I made her feel depressed, lost, and pained again and again, and finally let go, laugh, sing and dance.
I know Xin Qiji's words: "Sigh for life, unsatisfactory things, ten and nine."
I know that the background of life is sad . I often think about one or two, and don't think about it.
I know that in "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button", the elderly Daisy listened to her daughter reading the diary of love by Benjamin Button, a diary of love by the person she loved. The scene of the peaceful death, the hurricane outside was completely ignored.
Knowing so much, is it really easy to do it? This is not something that can be achieved by wading a river, climbing a mountain, and rest after tiredness, then climbing, wading, challenging, or changing the river or the mountain.
The second aunt is going through a huge test in life, perhaps relying on strong willpower, gift of life, and unrelenting courage can survive this catastrophe and regain a new life; perhaps she is about to come to the end of life, the aunt of this life. The nephew fate ends here. Since then, everything has become nostalgia, all memories.
I don't know, and I don't know, everything seems to be following the arrangements of fate. What I can do is limited, but I still repeat my prayers, wishes, and hopes over and over again.
We hope that destiny can treat the kind and strong second aunt in favor of her, so that she can be turned into a disaster. How much we hope it will be a false alarm, especially hope!
"Bamboo sticks and awning shoes are lighter than horses, who is afraid? Ren Pingsheng in a misty rain." I hope we can have more wisdom and courage, and hope that everything will be gentle and beautiful.
Looking forward to the antidote that heals all things-calmness and calmness in life!